Pram Face

Well hello there.

Just recently, within a few days of each other two things of a similar and oh so scary  nature happened to me.

First of all Charlotte, my betrothed called me form France and told me she needed to do a pregnancy test as she was late coming on her period and though I may have put a bun in her oven! I made all sorts of non committal noises whilst suppressing feelings of panic. The test came back negative by the way but it has brought forth a discussion on contraception and what we will do if she does get pregnant.

Then, maybe 3 days or so later I was walking along Chatham High St and I saw an ex girlfriend of mine walking in my direction. This doris is younger than me and we never did have a lasting relationship, it was much more of a fling and to be honest, a lot of really dirty sex. However this girl, as she wended her way towards me was pushing a pram! It’s been maybe a year since I last saw her and so my mind went into overdrive somewhat. When we eventually got to talking it became really obvious the baby wasn’t mine, the chief evidence of this being that the thoroughly adorable baby was of mixed ethnicity. I blew a mental sigh of relief.

This has all played on my mind a bit though. Is it that I don’t think I am ready to be a parent? Is that a stupid notion given that I am advancing in years, bearing down upon 34? When I do eventually become a father, what sort of dad would I be? I suppose these are thoughts that trouble all parents abut for me I am especially nervous given that my parental example is a fuckwit!

(if you were curious I favour the names Ilsa and Eleanor for girls and for boys I like Charlie and Jefferson)